Painful Incongruency

The Wounded Male- Enosh  

Many men are walking around wounded or have been severely wounded in the past which is effecting them now.  Becoming wounded is a part of growing up for a male.  It usually is a major piece of the teenager suddenly breaking into adulthood through trial by fire.  Just before the realization of the responsibility that full manhood brings with it.

The biggest problem with the wounded male is that it occurs in silence.  Even though this wounding is part of life we all know that real men don’t cry.  It’s instilled within us as youngsters.  Any other older male that has a direct effect on our lives lets us know that men do not cry.

It’s like when the little boy is out fishing with his grandpa and sticks his finger with a fishhook.  As the blood starts to run so do the tears and then grandpa shuts the faucet off with the words, “Hey, enough of that we men don’t cry!”  We men go through life experiencing painful shrapnel biting at us and we do not flinch.  Hey, man… being a warrior is noble and we are tough.  But given enough wars and enough scars and the man will be seriously wounded to incapacity or dangerous consequences.

 

The Ancient Metaphors and Archetypes of Wounds

 

There is a men’s movement under way and Robert Bly believes, the roots of the movement are within all the repressed pain inflicted from the battles of life.  For us to discover our manhood we must descend to the dark hallways of our souls to find all of our accumulated grief and deal with it.

Another metaphor is the thought of us wounding ourselves through all kinds of self-destructive behavior.  That discovery of manhood involves coming into contact with the innermost part of your soul and staring directly in the face of all our accumulated grief. In primitive societies men go through formal rites to manhood that involve the experiences of pain and wounds to their bodies. Circumcision is certainly a wound that is permanent and daily reminds him that he is a male.

Pain seems to be the pathway to manhood. It has been that way from the beginning of time and well recognized in most civilizations.  Here in our western culture that rite of passage is either denied or just plain forgotten.  The emerging men’s movement could be an effort to reframe and re-acquaint men and society with this wounding experience for men.

The Bible treats this wounding with honor and addresses it as a normal stop on our masculine journey. When men experience our wounds, we wrestle with God.

ENOSH: The Wounded Male

Enosh is a Hebrew word that conveys the concepts of weakness, being feeble and incurably sick.  It describes man’s mortality, calamity, frailness and the fears of men. [Isaiah 17:11, Jeremiah 17:16]

The life of Job pays homage to being wounded in the most severe form.  It illustrates the loss of his family, property, his health, and his wealth.

The prayers of Moses and David show is the Enosh man as well addressing a man whose “days are like grass” (Psalm 103:15) and who will turn “back to dust”. In experiencing woundedness we learn that we are not God, nor are we a little god, and we certainly are not even a little but like God.  It becomes an experience where we are wondering why or how God could possibly sohave anything to do with us at all. [Psalm 8:4] This is a normal experience yet why is it so very difficult for men to accept, talk about and heal from?

It seems both the biblical material and the contemporary literature on the subject support four convlusions:

One: The Deep Mortal Wound

The wound experienced is basically a mortal wound which means it is a death experience.  Every time a man gets a physical or a psychic wound it becomes another foretaste of death.  Each time we feel that pain something else dies within us. Men experience life through their bodies so when that body is wounded it is traumatic.

The wound is also spiritual and therefore the issues we face could be more of a theological nature than other issues.

When men experience midlife wounds, it could be the loss of marriages, jobs, dreams and ambitions. Sam Keen believes all men are in some way and some sense war-wounded. Because of this we have developed a well-crafted psychological armor to enable us to keep on functioning while not getting any healing.  Many men are becoming aware for the first time of the woundedness they experienced in jobs, failed marriages, drug addiction, and family origin or dysfunctionalism.

Two: Deep Loss Reactions

As men, we find our significant meaning by becoming the warrior and being phallic, therefore, when we become defeated in either of these areas it brings us a profound sense of loss. When we get wounded we no longer really know who we are.

Job was a warrior and he had it all. He had wealth and he had a large family, he had a supportive wife, a large estate, good friends and good health. But then one day he was dealt a cruel blow.  Likewise any of us could be hit with one well aimed cruel slug, it could be a car accident, a job loss, or a spouse walking out.  What happens then is we are wounded by life so we feel the remorse for what has been lost. We begin living in the romantic past when things were better.  That is what Job did.  [Job 29:1- 30:21]

Three: Alienation and Incongruency

When we get wounded by those blows that life deals out we tend to have our balance thrown off. A wounded believer will feel a sense of distance an alienation from God. (Psalm 73:1-14) Extreme incongruency with God might lead us to a new understanding and a respect for the mysterious ways of God. (Psalm 73:15-28) Men will tend to isolate themselves, buy some time and lick our wounds, and we won’t want anyone to come near us. This is usually seen as not wanting any help or a rejection of help, but it is a distinctive characteristic of a wounded male.

Just like a wounded animal, sometimes a wounded male can strike out at one that try to come with help. Men can externalize their pain and can manifest hostility and violence toward others

Four: Hostility and Violence

It does not matter how the wound occurs.  It could come from society or circumstances, by parents or a spouse, it does not matter because the male will feel powerless and will strike out. This hostile spirit is rooted in woundedness.  Many men in our society today are lashing out toward women, society, their bosses, and even God because they don’t understand the wounding experience. Men need to learn that out of their woundedness can come significant healing, meaning and growth.

PURPLE HEARTS for BROKEN SPIRITS

In our culture in America we have devalued the role of the warrior and also the role of his wounds.  By awarding a purple heart, the military recognizes, praises and awards the wounded male.  This is something that civilians are having trouble accepting.

We men need to affirm and value the wounds we receive ourselves.  Our own design and process as we go through life and our fathers, wives, and institutions are not going to do it. It might be that only in the circle of fellow wounded males can a purple heart for a broken spirit get awarded. Possibly from our time of wounding we could emerge as rulers of our own souls.

I believe its true that most of us men need the proverbial blow to the head with a two-by-four to wake us up and knock some sense into us.  In the movies we see men portrayed as the insensitive bozo’s that have no idea what is going on in their lives. We just don’t get it, when it is obvious to everyone else there is a problem. As an example a man will continuously deny his problem with drugs or alcohol until someone that cares enough finally confronts him about it.

“I must be ever so careful to remember that my pain is a precious salve that when used in the service of others can heal a thousand wounds and more. And I must likewise remember that if I do not use it as such, I have done nothing more than wound myself yet again.”
― Craig D. Lounsbrough

Again the credit goes to Robert Hicks and his book, “The Masculine Journey.”

Come back for the next post as I finish this up by exploring issues with other men and the Bible.  Click here to jump to next post.

The Tubthumper

FJ1

 

 

God the Warrior, Gibbor

GOD as Warrior 

As a reminder: Every society needs its warriors to survive.  It is the warrior in men that energizes us and allows us to defend our values.  It’s the warrior in us that allows us to stand our ground and protect and defend even to the point of death.  The warrior is an inherent instinct within the nature of men.

When looking at the term “gibbor”, we know that God Himself is a warrior.  We see the words of Jeremiah, “Forasmuch as there is none like unto thee, O Lord; thou art great, and thy name is great in might. [gibbor] – (Jeremiah 10:6) Please turn to Psalm 89 and you will observe the psalmist saying of God, “Thou hast a mighty arm: strong is thy hand, and high is thy right hand.  Justice and judgment are the habitation of thy throne: mercy and truth shall go before thy face.” – (Psalm 89: 13-14)   Righteousness and justice is the foundation of his throne and He is full of power and strength, He is exalted and He acts with love and faithfulness.

When God saves, and vindicates us humans it is His warrior strength that overcomes the enemy. (Psalm 54:1-4, 20:6) God’s warrior strength and the relationship with His character allows His name Yahweh to be identified with gibbor: “Therefore, behold, I will this once cause them to know, I will cause them to know mine hand and my might; and they shall know that my name is the Lord. [Yahweh]” – (Jeremiah 16:21) A commentator has observed, “One thing the Exodus does not require is any military violence on the part of the Hebrews… Moses arsenal does not include a single bona fide weapon – no swords, no spears, bows, or knives, much less chariots and horsemen. It is Yahweh who fights!

God is not passive.  He fights for His people to save, liberate, protect and sustain.  He has all the attributes of warrior.  I’m glad Jesus is a warrior, I’m glad He fought for my salvation by offering up His only son and glad He will fight again.

The Messianic Warrior

In the promise concerning the Messiah, one designation placed on Him will be “El Gibbor” or the mighty-warrior God.  “For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.” – (Isaiah 9:6) His name is listed alongside eternal Father and Prince of Peace. This indicates that being God is not inconsistent with being a warrior and being a warrior is not inconsistent with being the Prince of Peace. God’s ultimate representative, His own son, the Messiah, is a warrior fighting and laying down His own life for His Father’s cause.  And one day soon He will mount His white horse and slay the armies of the world to establish a perfect and lasting peace. (Revelation 19:11-21)

Gibbor as National Warrior and Hero

All through the Old Testament the use of “gibbor” refers to the experienced veteran of combat or the hero status achieved from spectacular feats of bravery. Psalm 19:5, Isaiah 36:5, Genesis 6:4, Genesis 10:9 are all examples.

Gideon and Jephthath, two of Israel’s judges were called gibbbors. (Judges 6:12, 11:1) In Judges chapter seven Gideon made a name for himself by destroying the pagan altars and fighting the Midianites with a corp of three hundred gibbors.

The reign of David advanced the concept of the gibbor to an outstanding militia and hand-picked corp of warriors.  It was carried on by Solomon and the number of his gibborim grew to 60.  He comments on their “parade dress” appearance in Song of Songs 3:7-8.

The warrior is part of the routine expression of manliness in the Bible. God the Father and Christ are examples of what it is.  As men, we need to embrace the latent or rejected warrior within for our own development and for the sake of our society and church. The warrior never serves himself. The warrior serves his king and his commander.  We must know and understand what and who we serve. The power of the warrior needs to be in the service of a larger view of masculinity.

Let’s be clear, being a warrior is not the goal of manhood.  It is a stop along the way to full maleness. Scripture shows that a true warrior should develop as a spiritual warrior.  This takes more than just being tough, strong, or determined to win.

Gibbor as the Spiritual Warrior

Solomon says, “Wisdom is better than [warrior] strength.” (Ecclesiastes 9:16) The psalmist adds, “He delighteth not in the strength of the horse: he taketh not pleasure in the legs of a man.  The Lord taketh pleasure in them that fear him, in those that hope in his mercy.” – (Psalm 147:10-11)

Isaiah declares a man’s real strength lies in things like repentance, resting in one’s salvation, and in the quiet trust of God. (Isaiah 30:15)  This is reaffirmed through the prophet Jeremiah: “Thus saith the Lord, Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, neither let the mighty man glory in his might, let not the rich man glory in his riches: But let him that glorieth glory in this, that he understandeth and knoweth me, that I am the Lord which exercise lovingkindness, judgment, and righteousness, in the earth: for in these things I delight, saith the Lord.” – (Jeremiah 9:23-24)

This clarifies the true warrior.  Not a warmonger or baby-killer but warriors that know their limitations and place their faith in God. The warrior does not trust in his own ability but he puts his commitment, allegiance and trust in God. For a man that has not had a significant male role model in his life this is bad news.  The fatherless generation could learn a lot about being a man through the study of God’s word and witnessing a true warrior in operation.  The true warrior does not trust his own strength but he trusts in the strength of the Lord.

On the other side of things, the psalmist admits that “gibbor” can use power for malevolent causes and become a violent man full of evil.  This is a possibility inherent in the warrior psyche.

“Blessed is that man that maketh the Lord his trust, and respecteth not the proud, nor such as turn aside to lies.” – (Psalm 40:4) and in contrast, “Thus saith the Lord; Cursed be the man that trusteth in man, and maketh flesh his arm, and whose heart departeth from the Lord.” – (Jeremiah 17:5) 

Job was told by God to “Gird up his loins as a warrior would do preparing for battle” in (Job 38:1-3) He was telling Job to receive the words of God as a warrior would do.  For three chapters God put Job in his place by reminding him of who he is and asking him to receive the admonition as a warrior would.  The warrior salutes and carries out the order.  No debate, just Yes, sir.

King David was a supreme example of the spiritual warrior and the gibbor.  He always credited his military accomplishments to God and sang praises to Him. (1 Chronicles 29:11-14) David also illustrated the downside of the life of the warrior.  To be a successful warrior, blood must be shed.  There is a certain irony in the life of the warrior. It is a much-needed stop on the male journey. It is where we grow up. But, it still involves, blood, risk, and/or sacrifice. We need to prove ourselves. It is different with each man how that occurs. Sometimes it takes all the warrior courage we can muster up to pull the task off.  Whatever it is, however, we must call forth the warrior within us to kill it. We must trust God with the outcome and risk psychological or physical injury to become men. “What is a man without his sword?”

The challenge of being a warrior is twofold:  Knowing what to fight for, and knowing when to quit and neither of these is easy to learn. Usually it takes a major and very tragic loss or a severe wounding within the life of a man to move him out of the warrior perspective.  The warrior never leaves us but if the warrior fights enough battles he can become seriously wounded.  The arrows find their targets and we become wounded to the point of new an uncharted territory.  It’s a dark and scary place.  It is a stage on the journey to manhood most men would love to skip.  If you are stuck in the wounded male space, you are lost and feel you will never find your way back.

This brings us to the subject for the next post, The Wounded Male- Enosh: The Painful Incongruency, so come back for this in the next posting.

All credit goes to Robert Hicks and The Masculine Journey.

God bless you all,

The Tubthumper

Click Here to jump to next Post- Painful Incongruency…

In the Footsteps of Your Father?

Placidtrail 

   Follow the markers and don’t get lost along the way…

“Have we not all one father? Hath not one God created us?” (Malachi 2:10a)

For you guys out there, have you thought about what it looks like to become a man.  And if you are a father, (defined that you have a son you are responsible for and haven’t just planted a seed and walked away like many) have you thought of the journey your son will make?  The journey to manhood is one that every male must take.

It is a sad commentary that in our times (2014) the jungle out there drains the manhood out of many and the survivors are few.  We now live in a society where there is very little direction for men.  There are no maps for our young men to follow.  Sadly there are few committed fathers willing to show the way young men need to travel.  Back in the day… fathers spent time with their protégé and taught them the way of the land.  They helped their son’s to earn the steps to manhood and to know the day they really become men.  Hikers can follow the markers on the Northville-Placid and Appalachian trails to show them each step along the way for miles.  The Appalachian Trail is a rugged trip through 14 states and each marker gets you one step closer to the summit.  Young men need some markers to show them to the summit of manhood.  They need the trail blazed ahead of them by strong men going forth first. appalachiantrail1

Growing boys and young men need a roadmap and need to see the lay of the land.  Even with seeing the lay of the land they will still need to make difficult choices along the way. A good father will provide a clear roadmap but will still allow the freedom of choice.  He will allow his sons to fail and experience the knowledge that comes from the school of hard knocks.  He will pick them up clean them off and lovingly but firmly set them on the trail again.  A father will provide corrective measures appropriately where needed and do what is necessary to help his seed mature and blossom at the right time. “He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.” (Proverbs 13:24)

Whether young or old, men need to have instruction repeated.  Most men need to hear instruction five to seven times before it sets in.  Repetition is good for males.  Repetition is good because we are woefully forgetful. “If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons. Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live?” ( Hebrews 12: 7-9)

The world we live in has changed.  Oh, if we could only wake up to the world we once knew it would be so comforting.  This is not to be.  Our world has changed and there is no longer a worldview of fatherhood.  Back in the day we had a good picture of our world with strong, loving and caring fathers.  Back in the day we had men actually fully integrated into family life.  We had fathers for children to go to for some guidance when they needed it.  Our world had fathers that would provide protection, guidance and comfort when needed.  We had fathers to model what a daddy or a husband looks like.  “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, The fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them; They shall not be ashamed, But shall speak with their enemies in the gate.” (Psalm 127: 3-5) If you were unfortunate and were one of the few back then that lost your father for some reason it was more likely one would come forth from your neighborhood.  Oh, how we lived in different times.

If you are on the Lake Placid hiking trail and you skip one or two of the markers or check-points along the way you will get lost in the wilderness.  The markers cannot be skipped and the check-points are there for security.  If you miss on of those you will incur a wound.  A son that misses a check-point in the journey to manhood will be lost and will have a wound. “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” ( Ephesians 6:4)  If they fall too far off the path they will have a deep wound.  As an example… If your father abandons your family you will need to become a man before you are ready.  You must fill the shoes of the father that should be there for you.  Because you need to fill his shoes you get robbed of your youth.  You are put under inappropriate stress and that is a deep, deep wound.  The scar will remain forever.

Have you ever noticed all the genealogical information in the Holy Bible?  It tells us that so and so begat this son and so and so was the son of this guy and he was the son of that guy and on and on it goes.  Father’s and sons obviously have great importance to God.  “The father of the righteous shall greatly rejoice: and he that begetteth a wise child shall have joy of him.” (Proverbs 23:24) There is hope!

We have hope to carry us through this troubling time.  If you are a man that became lost because you missed a marker or lost the map you can get on the right path.  You can find your way back.  If you are a young man and you want buck the tide and be a good father there is a way.  If you want to be a good male leader there is a way.  There is a roadmap that was developed ages and ages ago. It is for all to follow and it has markings every short distance traveled to show you the way.  You can see the truth and the forest through the trees.  It will show you the way!

There is a Father!  The father figure you have missed and are looking for is there.  He will show you the way and he will help you to stay on the right road.  If we all take a close look we can see God as that great Father we need.  When you read the scriptures it becomes clear the Bible portrays the Lord as the Great Father.  God created everything and God created you. He was not presented to us in the scriptures as mother.  God was positioned for us as the Father.  All throughout the Bible He is the Father.  Seek the Father… turn to His word, notice the markers and get on the right path. “Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God: therefore the world knoweth us not, because it knew him not.” (1 John 3:1)

 God Bless your day,

The Tubthumper

 

Meaning of Man, Part 2

Part 2 of 3 posts.

Ok men, here we go on the journey overview.  We will look at six stages and will begin with ‘adam.

Creational Male: The very first experience a man has is the only one that we share with females.  The foundational Hebrew word for man is ‘adam, which can refer to either male or female.  It reflects a generic idea of mankind.  For us men it tells us we are first and foremost (creational) beings.  We ultimately reflect our Creator.  We are flesh and blood, good ole red-blooded male material beings who someday will return to what we are, which is materially dust. Because we are creational we have capabilities that are divine and honorable.  We also came with a caveat, in that we are also capable of using the talents we were created with for evil purposes and no good.  We can never forget who and what we are as men.  We are beings that are capable of fantastic and glorious benevolence and at the same time we are beings capable of horrible and destructive evil.  We are capable of being rotten to the core and some, as you are aware, become evil beings.

Phallic Male: The second Hebrew word describes maleness in a basic and fundamental anatomical way.  The Hebrew word zakar is the word for “male” in the phrase “God created man ‘adam, male zakar and female”, Genesis 1:27.  If you check the Hebrew lexicons you will see they list the root of this term as “the male protrusion or male phallus”.  According to Dr. Hicks, “This word reflects the phallic male in his most distinct sexual aspect”.  We at our most primal level are sexual beings. The Bible is clear on this and does not pretend we are anything other than stated.  To be a male means you are a phallic kind of guy and you do not have a need to apologize for being that way.  You should never, ever allow it to be denigrated by women or by some crazy or crass individuals calling themselves men.

Warrior Male: I guess it is fact that there is a lack of true warriors in our society today.     The Hebrew word gibbor describes a male in his warring strength.  We know how it is right?  We war often to be the best, the biggest, the toughest, richest, smartest, etc, etc…  We kill our competition.  We do away with any opposing viewpoints.  We kill our declared enemies, and sometimes we end up killing our own marriages and families in the wake of things. This warrior and competitive warring is all part of being a normal man, however, the warrior has been de-valued in our contemporary society.  Because of the feminine influence and the sissification of men the warrior has become a nasty killer that is violent, stupid, careless and abusive.  Warriors are important to any society when they are fighting for the right things.  A nation without its warriors will be in very serious trouble when a situation arises that calls for war.  Strength, power, combativeness and competition are true masculine traits and unless we rediscover them and value them will lead our society into serious trouble.  There is another reality to a warrior.  The reality of combat is serious as warriors do get wounded and many die young.

Wounded Male: The next Hebrew word describes man in his weakness and frailty.  The fourth Hebrew word for man is enosh, the wounded warrior or the wounded male.  The contemporary male has been wounded by many things.  Our fellow men have been wounded by abusive fathers, absent fathers, domineering mothers, bad teachers and poor educational systems, toxic business takeovers, layoffs, failures, success, alcoholism, divorce, poverty and even wealth.  Men in our society are wounded and bleeding and are in need and don’t even know it.  Sometimes the wounded male recovers and sometimes they never do.  They become lost in the black hole of woundedness along the journey.   Men can remain wounded for the rest of life pretty easily.   Woundedness is a very important part of the normal male experience.   Wounds are predictable but very few men are prepared to deal with them.  The wounds are survivable and survivors can move along to some other gratifying male experiences.  Before you think I am portraying men as victims I want to point out that most men are to blame for a good percentage of our wounds.  We give up our place at times and we make mistakes.  All is not our fault as noted above but some is.  No matter what though, we need to man-up and get through it.

Ok men… we have reviewed the first 4 stages of the masculine journey.  Now come with me and let’s take a look at the last 2 stages.

Click here to go to part 3

FJ1

 

“The Tubthumper”

Meaning of Man, Part 1

Part 1 of a series of 3 posts.

This series of posts will be an overview of the six stages of masculinity from “The Masculine Journey”.

What does it mean to be a man?  What is manliness or masculinity?  Both men and women want to know the answer to the question, “What does it mean to be a man?”  Does anyone have a clue? I suppose most men would hesitate before throwing out an answer and would have a fear of getting swallowed by feminist equalitarianism when answering that question.

You men that have reached the mature or sage stage of your life might want to pass some of these posts on to your young men in the creational or phallic stages to help them to not get lost or stuck along the way to where you are. Oh, now you ask what is a “creational stage and what is a phallic stage”?  Stay with me on these posts and learn.  For you men that are looking for what has been lost I hope it shows up here.

The model that Jesus gives us in the gospel should provide a good visual image for man.  You must, however, study His life without any of the modern interpretations or miss-representations that I see so often.  You must read the word for what it is and let it speak for itself.  Jesus modeled both strength and sensitivity which change as men grow older.  Manhood will look differently as you move through your adult life cycle.

Remember men that your life is a journey and on any journey the landscape changes as you travel.  Some of you might say, “c’mon man”, there is nothing that is normal anymore when it comes to the subject of gender”.  To a certain extent I am inclined to agree with you if we’re only talking about our warped cultural and social mindset these days.  Make note, however, there are very critical differences between male and female in just about every area we can think of.  Because a high percentage of males born today do not have the presence of a father and we have a dominant force of feminine expectations about men, it is not “politically correct” or “socially correct” to be talking about “the normal male”.

As you men travel your journey you will leave and arrive at a new place at times.  You need to be aware when this happens that you will have a separation from the past, with an introduction to the new place and this will cause you some confusion to work through.

I don’t know that I will address marriage much here but when a man gets married he throws himself right smack dab in the middle of chaos and change.  I remember when I got married.  I did not give a second thought to the adjustment and change that would be required.  If all men would get in touch with the adjustment needed most would wait and some might be scared out of it.  Maybe, I say maybe, because I remember what was most important to me then.  It was to take my new bride and live happily ever after at whatever cost.  I was young, blinded by love and lust and I needed to conquer her.  I was heavily bound in the phallic stage which will be explained later.  I just had to have her be with me always.  Now if you were to combine another event to cause adjustment such as a young man losing his job in the first year of marriage the adjustment, chaos, confusion and transition is longer and harder.  When those kinds of things happen it will feel like your lesson is inappropriate for the season of life you are in and much too harsh.  These experiences are actually normal.  Don’t let anyone tell you they are not. These are rich experiences that will cause you to learn more about yourself and your manhood than any book or lecture could provide. Survive them and move to the next stop on your journey.

“The glory of young men is their strength: and the beauty of old men is the grey head”, Proverbs 20:29.  In other words, “young men are defined by their warrior strength and old men are defined by their wisdom” says Dr. Hicks.[1]  What a man is greatly depends on what season in life he is in.  These different seasons of life also provide different spiritual challenges and issues relating to faith.  Children need to know that sins are forgiven; younger men need to overcome the tendency to do evil; and older men need to hang in there and value the spiritual persistence. As it is written, “I write unto you, little children, because your sins are forgiven you for his name’s sake. I write unto you, fathers, because ye have known him that is from the beginning. I write unto you, young men, because ye have overcome the wicked one. I write unto you, little children, because ye have known the Father. I have written unto you, fathers, because ye have known him that is from the beginning. I have written unto you, young men, because ye are strong, and the word of God abideth in you, and ye have overcome the wicked one”,1 John 2:12-14.

In Dr. Hick’s writings he plotted out six Hebrew words that represent the male journey.

Follow along with me in part 2 as I provide a quick overview of each stage of the masculine journey by working through the meaning of these six Hebrew words from Scripture.

Click here to go to Part 2

“The Tubthumper”



[1] The Masculine Journey, understanding the six stages of manhood, by Robert Hicks, page 23.

Where are the “real” men?

Will the masculine man return to America?
Will our civilization survive the decline of manliness? What does it really mean to be a man?

Where are the men?  Where are you? I mean, where are the real men?  The sad commentary today is that men are either wimps or cruel barbarians.

First things first, if you are a woman this entry has nothing to do with you.  I have great respect for all you do and are and in many ways you are stronger than us men.  But this is a man thing.  The only thing I can say to you ladies is that I don’t understand why you tolerate some of the bums and barbarians that try to call themselves men.  That’s your business I suppose.

Now let me talk to the males in the house.

Back in the day, men understood what manhood was all about.  Excuse me for being blunt.  I have watched over the last 20 to 30 years as males have been feminized and sissified.  I have watched the protectors of women and children slump down to a place of “every man for himself”.  I have watched as men no longer spend time leading their families because they are distracted with their personal activities.  In short I have witnessed our men turn from our Judeo Christian examples of manhood to pure examples of paganism.  Men no longer are the protectors.  Men no longer are the leaders.  Men have given up their place as the headship and the women have taken over out of need.  I am sorry to say I am ashamed of my fellow man.  I am sorry if I am stepping on your toes, but, if the shoe fits, wear it.

Do young men of today even know what it means to be a man?  There are no fathers anymore and with no fathers there will be no men.  Think about it.  The statistics show that over 42% of male babies born today are born with no fathers.  The broken home syndrome of our society is taking its toll.  Even if there is a father connected to the household he is distracted with his selfish activities like sports and entertainment or hobbies.  The men of today are distracted beyond words from fulfilling their responsibilities.  Back in the day… sons and fathers spent the day together.  They worked together, they played together and they ate together and so the father was able to lead and teach.  Times have changed.  Men of today are not interested in leading.  Men of today are interested in escaping reality.  (I’m sorry guys but I call them as I see them.)  I see a majority of men around me practicing slothfulness and living on unemployment checks from the government while they enjoy time fishing and hunting while the wife slaves at the job and then comes home and cooks and cleans for them.  I know several men that for months and months told me there was no work to find.  I can tell you that like magic when the government checks stopped and the next time I saw them a job had been found.  They should have been doing whatever it takes from day one to provide.  It may have meant mowing lawns or digging ditches but you must do what it takes.  I know what you say, “I can’t do that I have a degree”.   To that I say, “who’s guiding you?”

I have several Amish families as neighbors and I watch them.  I can tell you they have clung to something precious.  In the Amish culture men are still men and Amish men teach their sons how to be men.  I admire that about them.  The sons are always with their fathers working from the time they can walk.  Their sons are always beside their fathers on the Sabbath and worshipping.  The Amish father is still the spiritual leader as well.  Maybe not having a television is good.

We need to get back to rising up mighty men of God.  If we don’t our societal failure is immanent.  Strong men need to be men of faith and leading the way in worship and prayer.  He needs to be teaching his faith to his children and passing it down.  We know from history that when society moves to paganism failure is soon to follow.  We need men of courage.  We need to get away from this feminization of men.  Will our sons of today be ready for the battles of the future?  Will they be ready for battling enemies both physical and spiritual?

Are you a male? Are you a man? Are you a real man?  Are you providing the teaching your children need?  Are you providing the protection for your family?  Are you providing the basic necessities for your family?  Are you leading your family in worship of the Lord?  Don’t neglect these responsibilities.  Equip yourself and engage.  Don’t be distracted or self-centered.  Be engaged and involved.  We read in 1 Cor. 16:13-14 what god wants in man, “Watch ye, stand fast in the faith, quit you like men, be strong. Let all your things be done with charity.”

So we can see from the authority of God that we are to: 1) Be watchful, 2) Stand fast in faith, 3) Act like a man, 4) Be strong and 5) All this is to be done in a spirit of love.

God is the creator and the source of strength.  We must submit to God’s rules  and when men do not fulfill their roles and responsibilities a society will break down.  Christian men need to follow the pattern of Christ.  Christ laid down His life for us.  Jesus is the sacrificial lamb.  He rules, protects, leads and guides.  He is the guide for all Christian men.  Christ defines manhood.  A biblical man understands what love is.  Love is sacrifice!  A man must be sacrificial.  In Ephesians 5:25 it says, “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it”.  This is the ultimate sacrifice.  Christ loved the church so much he died for it and He says that is the way we are to love our wives.  If your boat was sinking and you could only get one person off would you send your wife away and go down alone.  Or would you say, “Every man for himself” and jump for your life?  When the Titanic went down many years ago the majority of men were standing on deck watching the women and children row away as they sacrificed themselves and went down to their death. I hope it’s not as bad as I think but I see the situation today as if it happened again the women would be the ones standing on the deck and the men rowing to safety.  O lord I pray this is not the case.

The life of a Christian man is all about self-denial.  We are to take up our cross and follow Christ and His ways. (Matthew 16:24) After God and family you come first!

Can we ever inspire our sons again to act like men?  Be a valiant man.  Don’t be AWOL like so many men are.  Tell your family what Christ told us, “I will never leave you or forsake you”.

Please men… just man-up!

The Tubthumper